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15 Years and Counting

Posted on by Sherri

Today was the day that Chip and I celebrated 15 years ago that we had initial contact.  I say this because it would be at least a week or two later that we would even be able to have a date.

I had put a profile up on Yahoo personals because I really didn’t know what else to do.  I had these two little girls and a full time job.  I had no interest in finding someone in a club, nor was there anyone at work that really struck me.  There was also no goodness to come in dating someone from work.  My goal was to meet someone and see what happens.  There is so much craziness in Vegas that you don’t just go hang out at a bar and see if you meet someone.

I had dated a really nice guy from Michigan for a few months that I met at Yahoo.  He was a sports loving writer.  We had a good time and enjoyed each other’s company, but I think we both knew it was nothing long term.  He never met the girls and that didn’t seem uncomfortable to either of us.  B moved back to Michigan and although sad, I tried to move forward.  Forward to have someone in my life to share it with.  Then along came a message that would change the game.

Chip may not want me to share, but this was his first message to me:

Mon Oct 16 2000  03:34
Hi slpfrihse,

Yes, I think I am up for the challenge. Your ad made me chuckle. 🙂 Anyway, I think you described me to a T.

Let me give you the straight stats first: I am 28, 6’1″ tall, 195 pounds, brown hair, a full-time professional, graduate school education, homeowner.

And a little more:
I like to stay in shape, and work out regularly (usually 3 or 4 times per week). I’m not a he-man, muscle man, gym rat, or anything though… I am an avid hiker, going to the usual places around here: Mt Charleston, Red Rock, the Wetlands Park, etc. I also like to play tennis and racquetball, although I haven’t had a chance to play since moving to the area in January. I love cycling too – used to ride quite a bit in Oregon, but haven’t had the right company here yet to make it worthwhile here.

I love going out to restaurants, the movies, and taking weekend trips to scenic places. I don’t smoke, don’t gamble, don’t do drugs, don’t chew, and drink only occaisionally, always limited to a microbrew or two at a time. I also like to spend quality time at home
cuddling in front of a fire, talking, watching DVDs & making popcorn – being romantic in general 😉 I’ve been known to bring flowers often, and I’m just hoping to find a woman who’s going to appreciate the little touches of romance like that! 🙂

So heck yeah, I can love and cut loose and show my romantic and sensitive side. Now I’m just hoping I can find a woman who can appreciate it! Is that you? It sounds like it might be… 🙂

I’m a good conversationalist and I’m told I have a good sense of humor – I like to laugh and smile. I’m often complimented by women on my smile – I’m hoping that’s a good thing! 😉 I’m not much into dancing, but maybe that’s because I haven’t met the right woman yet
to make dancing fun.

I am a cat person – I have two cats that I spoil rotten, but they are very playful and great fun, not loaf around the house fat cats…

I listen to all kinds of music, although I don’t care for rap very much. I’m not a couch potato – I hardly watch TV at all, unless it’s to watch a movie. I do follow football and hockey, but I don’t let it dominate my weekends like some guys might, so don’t worry about that… And I don’t mind treking around the mall – it’s actually pretty fun if the company is right!

I guess to sum it all up, I am a good, honest, open, intelligent, professional, romantic, fun-to-be-with man that wants to share his life, feelings, and love with a similar woman. I am looking for a partner, the other half as you put it, and I am tired of immature, phoney, plastic women that lie and cheat in a relationship. I hope you decide to write back to me – it sounds like we’re looking for similar things and have a lot in common!’

And from there it went.  Yesterday I posted the following on FB.

It was 15 years ago today that yahoo personals brought me a reply to my posting that would change my life forever. Back in the day when it was free to list, this broken and a little bit bitter single mother received a message in my inbox from a gentle man who had as many convictions as I did. Whether it was sports, having a good time, music, passion or nerdiness. There was something about that message that took me in. I was scared to say I had kiddos, but did it anyway. He had hesitation but did it anyway. It would be almost 2 weeks until we would meet in person, but dayam we had amazing email and phone call marathons. By the time we met he knew I didn’t need a baby OR a sugar daddy. The attached song was an anthem of sorts for us because we were (are) both nerdy and met on the “internets”. I love this man more than I ever thought I could. We’ve done more together than I ever fathomed I would do alone, let alone with the person who is my soulmate. Neither of us are without flaws. I have bigger thighs than ever and have not even 1 college degree to his multiple, but he loves me crazy amounts anyway. We are us. We are meant to be.

A taste of the good, great, bad and ugly…
– were recovering from a shitty thing called divorce
– great travel to places East and West we never thought we’d see
– bought homes
– had foreclosures
– bought a business
– had failed businesses
– made it through infertility
– are raising multiples
– lost loved ones
– have seen blessings be born
– shared live music that we love
– have seen our gardens grow
– been unemployed

I could list so much more…I am blessed beyond belief. No matter what. My heart is full. Even on a hard day I’m grateful to the universe for bringing me my Chip. A Maryland boy for this Alaska girl. A beautiful heart that I get to be next to for the rest of this life. I love you dear…with all that I am. Cheers to many, many more.

This is how I really feel.  I am beyond lucky.  There is nothing that I’ve held back from this man.  Good, bad and ugly.  Sometimes it has been ugly because I don’t have the most impressive track record.  I have an interesting family life with my extended family.  I have weird baggage.  I married someone I should not have simply because I was pregnant the first time around.  Not a good decision on my part.

The above description was the man I met for sure.  Some days I feel life I’ve drug him down  and not let him live his potential.  Other times it is justified by this everyday life we have with lots of kiddos.  Who knows.  Regardless, I’m a lucky woman to have him.  We’ve endured a ton and I’m ready for the next 15 years and more.  Absolutely.  Without question.

 

Vacation Part X – Oregon to Nevada

Posted on by Sherri

We made our way through McDermott, hotter than hell and then we get the amazing welcome of the sign on the door that read “bathrooms for customers only”.  WHATEVER.  not happening.  We have 5 kids and they all need to pee.  I do too.  So not in the mood for anymore.  No one stopped us or said anything.  There was also another small problem I was having on top of all the rest…I had these weird bites on my legs that were very itchy and painful.  I felt terrible overall.  I just could not shake these weird bites of whatever they were.  I was beyond miserable.  Add to that that when we got to Winnemucca, my mom’s gate was locked.  She had gone fishing.  OMG…could this get worse?  Still 106 degrees outside and oh man…it was rough.  And I still had to get our 1/2 beef.  And I was exhausted.  And I was in pain.  Perfect storm.  Chip threw the stuff we needed over the fence and we climbed the fence.  Luckily I had a key to the house.  We overnighted at moms.  Next morning, hubs loaded up all the stuff and kiddos and headed home in a jam-packed minivan.  I stayed behind to get the meat in the big ole diesel pusher Dodge.   The final leg of the McVey Vaca. This was fun, but not without its own bunch of crazy, and a lot of driving.
I’m still having trouble with my legs/feet.  Finally, I was able to pick up our beef.  Jim’s wife commented on my legs/feet when I picked up the boxes of beef.  I felt like a lepper.  It was all I could do to get that loaded and get going.  I high tailed it out of there because I too was worried about my legs/feet and wanted to (hopefully) get to an urgent care.  I had reached my max.  The itching.  The heat.  The kids.  The lack of air conditioning.  I made my way out of the Mucc, headed for Reno and over to St. Mary’s Quick Care at Walmart about 15 minutes before they closed.  Because it was so hot, Chip came and grabbed the truck and I would take the minivan home.  I walk in and they say it’s too late and I can’t be seen.  At that moment, it was so overwhelming.  The tears came.  I was so DONE.  There was no more to give.  I begged them.  Luckily they saw me.  It was flea bites.  From somewhere.  Really?  Great.  Just great.  Then I had to trek over to CVS for antibiotics.  Wow.  Amazing.
Regardless of all of that, a big, huge THANK YOU to all of those who housed, fed, partied, laughed, and put up with invasions of the McVey family. It’s quite a big undertaking to take on 7. Hopefully, we didn’t leave too much devastation as we left each place. We’re grateful to all that we were able to share special times with so many. Friends and family that we didn’t get to see, we are sorry we couldn’t make it happen. We hope to get up to WA/OR again soon. Now a week from now I must start to work hard to remove some of the vacation food and drink indulgence weight gain.  Gillian was a trooper too. Hard to be tied to a bunch of rambunctious little boys for days on end when you’re right smack in the middle of being a teenager. Chip, Gill and I had some great conversation about all of it on our last night.  Wish I had one more day to breathe, but it is what it is and we’ve had a fun time with our travels. Thank you hubs for packing, unpacking, packing and unpacking with all the kiddos in tow.

Vacation Part V – Oregon Tigard

Posted on by Sherri

So we get up early to leave, Chip packed the car super fast as I gathered, herded and managed to get myself ready.  Neither Chip nor I had a chance to get anything to eat.  We were hyper-focused on leaving to avoid Seattle traffic.  This would definitely come back to haunt us.

Off to Oregon way we went!  We managed to leave Dawn and Rusty’s around 10:30 or so, give or take 30 minutes.  We knew it would be bad, but not how horrific this day would be.  5 mph on I-5.  Seriously.  I was trying so hard to be calm.  After a while, it was just infuriating.  Especially considering the hunger factor.  I tend to go from zero to bitch in about a millisecond when I’m frustrated and hungry.  It was all I could do to not hurt our children in the car with me as I was spouting off at Chip how horrible it was as the hours wore on.  I wanted it to be his fault.  It so wasn’t.  It really wasn’t.  As the day wore on, if traffic allowed for 20 mph it made me super happy.

Of course it IS July.  It IS hot out.  No, we don’t have snacks.  Arrrrrrggggghhhhh.  This went on for a few more hours.  Finally at about 3:30p we got off the God awful freeway and made our way to a Jimmy John’s Deli.  We had never been there before, so ordering was interesting.  I desperately wanted a drink…if only drinking and driving were legal.  And…I was still itching.  A lot.

Adding insult to injury, the speed limit in Oregon is 55 mph.  Finally at about 6:30 or so, we managed to reach Danny and Jamie’s.  Thank god we had cold wine!  It was so fabulous to visit with Bunny, Bill, Danny and Jamie.  It was way too quick at less than 24 hours, but we crammed in all of the wine and conversation that we could.  The kids enjoyed the cat, but Ryan had a little reaction.  No, we didn’t punch him.

IMG_2954

After wayyyyyy too much wine, I went to bed.  Chip, Bunny and Bill stayed up and enjoyed more wine and conversation.  As soon as the alcohol had worn off, I was awake.  Off to Fred Meyer I went.  Early in the morning, the store was quiet.  As I roamed the beautiful store, it made me nostalgic for my Alaska home.  I remembered how much I enjoyed shopping at Fred Meyer out on Dimond.  Amidst my thoughts of home, I gathered up sausage and biscuits because I was set to make the best hangover food ever!  Biscuits and gravy.  I found all of my ingredients but made no hurry of leaving the store.  I was reliving my past in Anchorage.  God how I miss that place.  Living there.  And the people.

Anyway, back to Horton’s I went and whipped up some breakfast while everyone, with cobwebs in their head and all made their way through the morning.  Chip and I quickly packed up because we had to get to Winnemucca within the next 24 hours or so to pick up our half beef.  Always something.  Always a deadline.  Made it feel like it was not a vacation.  Oh yeah, I was still itching.  Bad.  Really bad.

Sad, Sad Day in Sparks, Nevada

Posted on by Sherri

Here in our little Reno/Sparks area this morning a middle school boy took his parent’s gun to school and started firing. The gunman (child) killed a teacher and wounded two others before shooting himself.

Sad, very sad that a wonderful teacher is dead, fortunate that the other two are going to be OK (so far) and grateful that the shooter is no more. I’m still stunned by it. We live in a small place. I never thought anything like this would happen in my city. Then again no one else does either, no matter where they are. It was comforting to receive messages from so many people and be fortunate enough to say that our kids are OK and were not anywhere near the area of the shooting.

Since it happened around 7a this morning I took pause as I took the boys to the bus stop and watched them get on the bus. They had a field trip today to the pumpkin patch (I could not go…work commitments) and I was relieved that they weren’t at school. I never want to get that call that the school is locked down or that someone is crazy with a weapon. I cannot imagine the fear and panic of the parents as they went to find their kids or the kids that witnessed the horrific ordeal.

After seeing the coverage all over the local news this morning and then tonight on the National evening news I am proud of our little city and the public servants we have. Over 200 first responders were on the scene and law enforcement arrived within 3 minutes of the 911 calls. Washoe County School District police, Reno PD, Sparks PD, Washoe County Sheriff as well as others.

My sincere condolences to Mr. Landsberry’s family as they grieve a man who died a hero trying to protect children. Being a former marine, he was a hero before he even stepped into the classroom. Even though I don’t know him I am planning to attend any memorial or fundraiser that I can. It is the least I can do.

“Copy Club” AKA Elementary School Clique

Posted on by Sherri

Monster RisoSo I’m trying to help at my the boy’s school once a week for an hour to two hours.  I feel very fortunate that so far I’ve been able to do it.   My goal is to become a part of this new school since the boys will (as far as I know) be going to the school for their Elementary years.  We are coming from another school that offered full day kindergarten.

After arranging a time with their teacher I go head down to the copy room.  These copiers are old and rickety. There are 4 machines in this room. I am pretty stunned at the condition. I am looking at these behemoths and wondering if they are older than me.  I’m thoughtful for a moment because I remember working for the KPBSD in Soldotna as a receptionist in the late 80’s and I don’t think that any of those copiers ever had to create a master and then copy.  Anyway, these monster machines look intimidating.  After taking a deep breath I walk up and put the paper on the glass.  You would think that the paper loading would be pretty simple.  Well no.  On this old as dirt copier requires the paper in the center of the glass.  Then it needs to create a “master” that literally sprays ink on a sheet of something that looks like contact paper and then I have to hit the button again for the remaining number of copies.  I’m not sure if the master counts as one or not, but whatever.  I manage to fumble my way through several worksheet copies because there are other copiers in the room that have big signs above them “NO MORE THAN 18 COPIES AT A TIME”.  Well I break the rules because I am determined to get these copies made.  I mean really?  Does it have to be this complicated?  Anyway, you get the gist that I took far longer than needed to make copies.  Then I move on to the paper cutter.

The paper cutter is no better. Squeeeeeeak.  All the way down the blade squeaks.  Barely closes all the way and then clamps down.  I’m sure an experienced volunteer would have been laughing their butt off.  I get a few things done and move on.

Fast forward to the next week.  I am told the copiers/cutters in the teacher’s lounge are far better.  They also have this thing called an “Ellison” that is like a stamp that cuts uniform pictures.  I’ve never seen one before but it’s very cool and easy to use.  My copies are mostly working.  I’m feeling like I might just be able to get this.  Just maybe.

In walks a woman (we will call her L) with a stroller and a little one around two years old.  She is also obviously pregnant…very pregnant.  Not that it matters, just an observation.  She whips through and makes a gazillion copies in like 30 seconds.  Sherri is feeling inept again.  For this type A girl it kind of pissed me off.  Anyway, she turns to me and says “copy club”?  I told her I had never heard of it.  She tells me it’s the “trained” copier group and ONLY Copy Club is supposed to be using “the better copiers” in the teacher’s lounge.  So many thoughts were going through my head.  I say “I never knew of any Copy Club”.  L says “well we train people how to use the copiers and other equipment”. “Too many people who aren’t trained break the machines”.  My head is going nuts thinking things like “who IS this woman” and why do I care?  I finish my stack (as best I can) and go back to the classroom and share with the teacher that I’m happy to give my time, but will not be steamrolled by the Copy Club.  Mrs. M.  rolls her eyes.

I come back THE next week.  Go to the parent work room since I’m not allowed in the teacher’s lounge to make copies.   There are several people coming and going.  Of course the first copies I make jams the copier.  OMG.  What am I to do since I am not trained?  I open the dinosaur and know immediately that I’m in serious trouble.  Ink, round, lots of buttons to open things, error codes, arrrggghhh.  I am totally out of my league.  There is a woman, rather staunch looking, who is showing someone how to use the laminating machine.  She glances at me as I ask for help.  Another woman comes over to help.  Basically the “master” was jammed.  Ink everywhere. The 2nd woman was very helpful.  Staunch lady mumbles under her breath “you need to take training”.  “Have you taken training” she asks?  “No, I didn’t know that I had to and thought I could ask for help” I say a bit exasperated.  I’m thinking to myself that this is such bullshit.  I mean OH MY GOD, really?  I am seriously dealing with a clique of ladies who think they are better since they are part of the “Copy Club”.  I’ve had enough by now.  Back down to the classroom I go and cut stuff out because I cannot stand to look at these women.  They must not have enough to do.

After school I talk to Mrs. M again.  I tell her that I will not tolerate cliques and have no desire to spend my time fighting other parents to offer my time at school.  I don’t have to take the rudeness and unwillingness to help someone who is new to the school.  Mrs. M. is wonderful and says she’ll take care of it.  I said, as nicely as possible, that if not, I won’t be coming in.  It’s 1.5 hours out of my workday that I can give to a lot of other people/things.  I gather up the boys and head home.

I open my email and there’s an email from Mrs. M., who introduces me to C., the coordinator of volunteers.  After the into I figure gloves are off.  I fire off an email to C. and introduce myself and share my dissatisfaction of the other volunteers.  She responds that of course this isn’t tolerated and that they “welcome anyone who volunteers” (yeah, uh huh, right).  We arrange to meet up so that she herself can show me the ropes.  Um OK.  Basically they win and I must take the training.  Blech.  I hope that this is not a taste of what’s to come.

I wonder if I can join the PTA if I don’t take training first?  I know.  Catty.

My iPhone 5s Experience…

Posted on by Sherri

iPhone 5s 1I ordered my iPhone 5s today.  However, it has taken me ALL day.  Why you ask?  Well I’m going to share the story.

I have an iPhone 4 and if I have to see the spinning circle take for freakin’ ever anymore I am going to stab my eyes out.  I’m moving back to AT&T from Verizon and will save $50 a month too!  I love corporate discounts. The store is by Carter’s preschool so I thought I’d give it a whirl.  I get to the store and there are 4 AT&T employees at the door.  I ask what the wait is.  “You’re next” says clean-cut-iPad-holding employee.  First I was stunned after I read a Facebook post from my friend Fred about long  lines.

There were quite a few people in the store but less than I thought since this is 5s day.  So I begin to tell guy at the door that I am coming over from Verizon, adding a line, porting my number and I want to buy the iPhone 5s in silver.  Um yeah…no.  Nothing but black and by-the-way, there is a 21 to 28 day wait for all who want anything but black.  I also can’t get it shipped to my home.  Only to the store. Once I knew they didn’t have it I told them i’d go order online.  No big deal.  It is what it is.  Oh that was not to be.  Once in the store they didn’t want me out of the store and they wanted me to purchase iPhone 5 accessories “that fit because the 5s is the same footprint as the 5”.  Well, yes and no.  Footprint is the same.  Camera and flash shape.  No, does not fit.  Buyer beware.

I say “alright I guess I can place an order since I’m here”.  Clean cut says “OK, someone will be right with you”.  Weird.  So I wait and then wait some more (no wait…yeah right) and wait some more for a salesperson since clean cut guy can’t take my order.   I thought “what a bummer that I can’t get my iPhone for about a month”.  More spinning circles in my near future.  Yay me!  I’m feeling like I don’t want to be there anymore and really shouldn’t have come in to begin with, should have known it would not be amazing and should have done research.  An hour later my salesperson has my order, arranges porting and I finally get to get out of the store.

So I hop in my minivan that I love so much and head on home.  Silly me thought I’d check the AT&T website and see what messages customers get when they order.  An order can be placed and it says it will ship in 7 to 14 days.  I freak when I see it because it’s THEIR website.  So I get to online chat on the website.  I tell (type) her my dilemma.  Well online can’t do anything about what happens in a store.  I call store and ask them (nicely) to cancel my order because I can get the phone in half the time if I order online on the AT&T website.  Meanwhile online chat is still going and “Mary” will wait for me.   They nicely cancel my order but not before telling me that “we give the information we are given and don’t know what’s on the website”.  I am stunned that they wouldn’t know what is on the website, but am grateful they are canceling for me so I said nothing about it.

I’m relieved that I won’t have to go back to the store.  I’m still chatting with Mary about placing the order online.  She says she’ll talk me through it.  HA!  I go through the process and too much time lapses and I get kicked out of my account after I have some trouble accessing it.  Then my browser tab is blank.  Mary asks me to clear cookies.  I go to my other PC.  Try the process and can’t port my number.  What?  Seriously?  So I go try at the Apple website.  Same thing.  Mary is still waiting and “is here for me”.  I chat back to her that I can’t port.  She tells me to call Verizon to get a release.  I chat back that at the store they had no problem.  I call Verizon anyway.  As I suspected they were not holding it and hadn’t even been notified yet.    Verizon is so awesome and the girl I spoke to was fabulous and tried to keep my business.  I told her that that I understood but they could not match our combined price from AT&T.  I had a little guilt saying that but it is the bottom line.  Meanwhile Mary is chatting to me that I should just take a new number and then when I get the phone have the number ported.  Um no.  I think not.  Soooo I ask Mary if I couldn’t do it online because they set up the port at the store?  She chats that she doesn’t know.  I dial the store and they tell me that I have to call the “port number”.  I call the 800 number and get a nice person who is in the process of removing the first port the number request and the call drops.  Awesome.  Not.  So I call back.  They cancel the port.  I am finally able to do it online but not before getting kicked out at least 3 more times because I needed to get my Verizon account number, looked at me email and didn’t advance the screen fast enough. Then I get an alert on slow phone that there was an accident near my house.  Then what do you know?  The internet goes down.  Finally, yes finally I place my order online and get confirmation.  I started at 9 a.m. when I stepped foot into the store and at approximately 2 p.m. I am successful.

So in 7 to 14 days we’ll see what happens.  Hubs says it’s because “you have to have the latest and greatest”.  Well no, not really.  I’m 3 phones ago.  Cut me some slack daddy-o!  I thought it was going to be easy!

On another note, I downloaded iOS 7 on my slow phone.  I love it.

 

6th Birthday Preparation

Posted on by Sherri
OK.  So I now know, deep within my soul, that I am not meant to be a) a baker and b) a cake decorator.  I’ve always admired my sister Dawn Noble‘s talents.  Between baking, cooling, cutting and my version of “decorating” a Creeper cake it is now 12:30 a.m. and I am finally cleaning up.  This, my friends, is why I will be buying cake moving forward.  Worth every penny.  Wish my sister was closer to… do it for me.  Boys haven’t seen the cake yet.  FB land gets it first.  I’m pretty exhausted so I have to show it to someone!  Chip McVey is snoring on the sofa.  He did all of the wrapping (I let go of the control).  Now to get to bed (after the dishes) and prepare for their first Chuck E. Cheese adventure.

6th Birthday Reflections

Posted on by Sherri
It is now officially after midnight.  Reflection time.  I cannot believe it’s been 6 years since we were preparing to go have these babies.  Thinking about it bubbles up a lot of emotion (no surprise to my friends).  We had such a time trying to have them (I so want to lay it out in this post but not the time).
Everyone in the house is asleep and I still have dishes calling but I want to be online… writing about it instead.  Right before these boys were born we had so much fear.  Fear of doing it, fear of possible circumstances, fear of being able to do it.  I was so glad my parents were able to be with us.  A miracle with my dad’s illness.
I’ll never forget sitting and waiting together. These little guys came into the world so quickly and with so many unknowns.  I was happy to wake up to my mom and dad watching over me.  Chip was off making daddy decisions in the NICU while I recovered.  Waking up (sorta consciously) with family was good.  From there time flew with NICUs, Big Gary and little Gary’s illnesses and a blood transfusion for me, not anticipating a death to follow.
Fast forward in time and it continues to fly by faster than I can keep up with.  Many seasons have changed, a lot has happened (both positive and negative), and we were/have been so fortunate to have so many be a part of our community to raise these boys. Every.single.person is appreciated whether I’ve said so or not.  To some I haven’t had the opportunity to express my appreciation and I am sorry for that. Others (I hope) you know that every minute you spend/have spent helping us is valued more than we can say. So many events between now and then.  You’ve been a part of shaping our lives.  I am more than grateful to everyone who has been involved over these years.
My girls (Kate Frihse and Gillian Frihse) amaze me.  Young women doing very cool stuff and all the while being good to their brothers who think they are beyond amazing.  Just feeling blessed with all of those who are and aren’t here that have been a part of this journey.  More to come later today I’m sure.  Regardless…thank you thank you beyond words.  Momma will be mushy for a few days.  I feel like I’m allowed.